20 Best Jokes About OLD People The They Will Not FORGET!

#elderly #jokes #oldpeople

1. I asked my grandpa: “ after 65 years you still call grandma darling, beautiful and honey. What’s the secret?”
Grandpa: “I forgot her name five years ago and I’m scared to ask her.”

2. What's it called when you sleep with 3 old people in one day?
A geri-hat-trick.

3. Why do old people like golf?
Just like in their life, the goal is to get the least amount of strokes before you go in the hole.

4. Why do old people print so slowly?
They can't Ctrl, P.

5. What kid of music do old people listen to?
Hip-Pop.

6. What happens when you gas an old people's home?
Silence of the nans.

7. What is the best contraceptive for old people?
Nudity.

8. Regular naps prevent ageing.
Especially if taken while driving.

9. A doctor recently told me that I have cancer and now he's saying that I also have dementia.
At least I don't have cancer.

10. The secret to having a smoking hot body in old age?
Cremation.

11. 2 old women are sitting on a bench on the seafront.

"Oooh, it's windy!" "No, it's thursday!" "Me too, let's go for a cup of tea".

12. As you get older, three things happen: The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.

13. I’ve heard it said that getting older is like living in a haunted house. There’s lots of noises and smells you just can’t explain.

14. Getting old is reaching the wonder years! You wonder where your keys are. wonder what day it is. wonder where your car is parked.

15. Getting older has some benefits… Call it a “senior moment” and you can get away with just about anything!

16. Age is a relative thing. All your relatives keep reminding you how old you are.

17. Retirement is when you’ve reached the age when everything is beginning to click. Your knees, your hips, your elbows…

18. Don’t stress about your eyesight failing as you get older. It’s nature’s way of keeping you from shock when you go by a mirror.

19. You know you’re old when your back goes out more than you do.

20. You know your getting old when you walk into an antique store and they try to sell you.