Russian missile strikes boat in Western Australia

Ukrainian army command says a Russian Iskander missile is responsible for bombing a boat at Aquarama Marina in Perth. Labelling this brazen attack as yet another example of Russian war crimes and attempted genocide of Australians, President Zelensky is calling for its allies to provide it with nuclear weapons to end the war once and for all. USA military intelligence have confirmed it was indeed a Russian missile, and reiterated its unconditional support for Ukraine, promising to consider Kyivs request at the earliest opportunity after the mid term elections. A well placed white house source, speaking on condition of anonymity as no one wants to be associated with this administration, has confirmed Pedo Byden did in fact soil his nappy again this morning.