What is the Difference Between a Friend and an Acquaintance?
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You can't live your life alone. Relationships with others are an essential part of life.
Most men don't have friends. They have a lot of acquaintances.
That's a problem. Proverbs 27:17 says, "As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend." If your friends aren't sharpening you, they're not your friends. Don't get me wrong, you can keep hanging out with them, and that's not a problem. It's fun to get together with other guys, watch a football game, put on a deer drive, and hit the golf course. However, most of those guys are your acquaintances. They're not your friends.
If you assume your acquaintances are your friends, you will be disappointed. Friendship should sharpen you. Friendship should be a meaningful part of your life that cannot be easily disposed of. Try to surround yourself with faithful and dependable men. The kind of men you can ask for help, and they will show up. Try to surround yourself with accountable men. You can hold them to a high standard, and they can hold you to a high standard.
Friends should always move you closer to Jesus.
That's what sharpening looks like. You need men in your life that will sharpen you. You cannot honestly know God and know your purpose entirely on your own. You need solid friends who follow Jesus and consistently push you to do the same.
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Financial Wisdom: Planning with Purpose and Intentionality
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Have you ever heard the saying, “If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail?” While this is true in life overall, it is especially true in our finances.
Godly men take their role and responsibility seriously and your finances impact both.
Both your purpose and the people God has given you to lead and serve require you to care for your finances with intentionality. You need to have a plan to care for both the people and purpose in your life.
If you go into your finances alone without God’s wisdom, without godly counsel, and without a plan, you are gambling with the opportunities and impact God has for you and that is not a gamble you want to make because it rarely works out.
The reality is, one day we will all spend our last day on earth. While this is a sobering statement, it is not something we think about when we are young. But, if we don’t start when we are young, we risk our financial peace being replaced with financial stress.
You might have heard the phrase “money is the root of all evil” – but did you know it is actually a misquote? What Jesus says is, the LOVE of money is the root of all kinds of evil. Jesus also talks about how we cannot serve God and money. Ironically, when we don’t develop a godly plan, we allow money to be a source of stress which can become its own destructive evil or idol in our lives.
Men, take this responsibility seriously. Have a plan for your finances that is centered on godly wisdom and godly counsel, so you don’t let it get in the way of the meaningful purpose God has for you.
So let me leave you with some financial advice from Paul in 1 Timothy 6:17-19: Teach those who are rich in this world not to be proud and not to trust in their money, which is so unreliable. Their trust should be in God, who richly gives us all we need for our enjoyment. Tell them to use their money to do good. They should be rich in good works and generous to those in need, always being ready to share with others. By doing this they will be storing up their treasure as a good foundation for the future so that they may experience true life.
God wants to use your finances, no matter how much or how little you think you have, for important things.
To provide for your family, to invest in Kingdom efforts, and to be generous to those who need them. Make a plan that reflects a trust in God so He can make the most of what you have and invest in treasure that will last forever.
We’ll see you next time.
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Godly Guidance in Financial Decisions
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Our lives are packed with infinite amounts of choices. Walk down any cereal aisle at your local grocery store, and this becomes obvious quickly. In fact, name any sort of product or food and you can quickly become overwhelmed with the sheer volume of flavors and options. So how do you know what the right choice is? When it comes to our finances, there are different philosophies, tools, and advisers to choose from and the consequences can feel much more important than just what cereal to eat for breakfast.
First go to God and ask for His wisdom. Then ask Him to lead you to the right counsel from others around you.
Proverbs 15:22 says, Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.
Advisors can direct us in such things as creating a budget, developing a plan to save, getting out of debt, and many other important things related to our finances. It is imperative to plan in this area, as finances are critical in providing for the role and responsibilities God has given you. You must take it seriously.
Don’t let your pride get in the way of getting help.
Don't let the number of options overwhelm you. There is no shame in asking for help, in fact, the only shame would be trying to do it alone. Seek wisdom from God and take the next step in pursuing godly advisers who can help you create a plan that honors Him and what He’s called you to do.
If you need a mentor or coach, contact us here at Men of Iron and we can work on making that happen. Start seeking advice from a godly mentor or coach and make a plan to crush your financial goals!
I’ll see you next time!
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Invite God Into Your Finances
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Today, we are surrounded by many good programs and advisors to help us with our finances. This includes faith-based organizations that hold to solid Biblical principles. But too often we forget to go directly to the source and invite God into our financial world. With countless financial tools at our fingertips, we can’t forget the best one – the creator of the universe who invites us to seek His wisdom.
James 1:5 says, If you need wisdom, ask our generous God and He will give it to you without rebuke.
God is an infinite source of wisdom and WANTS us to come to Him and ask for His input. It is not a burden to Him; it is not going to bug Him – He WANTS you to ask. And yes, seek wise counsel from Godly men, but if you haven’t started by asking God to lead you to those men, you’re missing a crucial step in the process.
When it comes to your finances, start with asking for wisdom from the Source.
Ask God to lead the way in your finances, He wants to hear from you today.
We’ll see you next time.
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9 Practical Financial Tips For Christian Men (EP. 220)
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Trav and Scott start are back for the final week ofThe Money Series!We close out the series giving you nine practical financial tips to help you in your finances. The first and most important tip you can do is to put God first when it comes to your finances.Be intentional about taking these tips and putting them into practice in your life.We are NOT financial experts, these tips are just practical tools to help you in your financial journey
Here are 9 Practical Financial Tips:
#1 –Invite God into your finances
#2 –If you are married, make it a team game
#3 – Seek out a coach
#4 – Create a budget
#5 – Return your first 10% to God
#6 – Save for the storms
#7 – Get out of debt
#8 – Save for retirement
#9 – Seek ways to give generously
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Buyer's Remorse
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Have you ever made a purchase and immediately had buyers’ remorse? I mean you really, really wanted to make that purchase, but deep down inside you knew you shouldn’t. But then you talk yourself into it by telling yourself that this is the time to buy it and you need to act fast! Ever been there? I know I have. Probably more times than I am willing to admit! But these are the kinds of decisions we want to help our children to not make in their own lives. Especially the lessons on how to avoid unnecessary financial pain from bad decisions.
So, we need to teach our kids how to spend wisely.
To consider the things that are needful first, like paying our bills and taking care of our responsibilities. These are the principles we need to train our children in. And we need to be clear that sometimes this includes words like, ‘patience’ and ‘waiting.’ As humans, this is something we all struggle with and why I believe we should always PRAY before we purchase. Now I don’t mean if we are making a small purchase, like buying a candy bar or breath mints, but on what we see as a bigger purchase financially. Are we as fathers allowing our children to see us practice this principle of spending wisely? If not, let’s start. Let’s include our children during our prayer time for these things. Have you ever heard that sometimes things are learned by being caught, than taught? This is one thing I witnessed by my father. He included us in his prayer time, especially for those bigger purchases. We should also teach them the topic of SAVING. As fathers, one easy system to use is the 10-10-80 rule in finances:
Tithe – 10%,
Save - 10%,
Live off the remaining 80%.
You can teach your children to do this same concept with three envelopes – Tithe: 10%, Save: 10%, then Spend Wisely (with your supervision) the remaining 80%. I know this is not the most exciting thing you will teach your children, but the dividends will pay for the rest of their lives. And one day they will tell the stories of how glad they are that their father taught them how to be smart with their money.
Have a great day!
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Be A Cheerful Giver
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Have you ever experienced great joy by giving to someone else? Maybe it was someone in great need, or maybe it was just a small gesture to be kind to a friend. Either way, I hope you have experienced the joy of giving in this way! There is really nothing like it. The Bible even tells us to be gracious in giving to others. And one of the ways we give, is in returning the tithe to God through giving to the church. Notice I said return the tithe.
That is because it all belongs to God. We cannot freely give what is not ours, but we can return it.
And God only asks us for obedience in returning 10%. The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 9:7 - Decide in your heart what to give, not reluctantly or by compulsion, but even to have a spirit of cheerfulness and joy as we give, because God loves a cheerful giver. So, it is important AND we should be teaching this to our children. It is a principle that when learned and implemented early in life, can be such a blessing to our kids. We see the Apostle Paul teaching the early church about giving many times. Paul even quotes Jesus in Acts 20:35 remembering the words the Lord Jesus said - It is more blessed to give than to receive. Selfishness and greed are so ingrained in us from birth. It is just not natural in us to be generous.
This is another reason we should train our children to give, and give freely, not grudgingly, but with joy!
And the starting point to this life of giving is by giving tithes. But this also requires us parents to live this principle out in front of our children. So, there is your challenge! Be obedient to scripture and responsible to your children. Give, and teach them to give as well, and they too will experience all the joy that comes with it.
Have a great day!
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How to Raise Kids Who Are Smart About Money (EP. 219)
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Trav and Scott start are back for Week 4 as we continue The Money Series! Today we talk about raising your kids to be money smart. It's never too early to start teaching your kids about money. There are 4 things you want your kids to know about money – work, give, spend wisely and save. Men, it's important to not just have these conversations with your kids, but to live it out as well. Your kids are watching, are you being lazy or are you out working hard? Say yes to hard work. If we dont' teach our kids about money, who is going to teach them? It takes intentionality, teaching your kids to be smart with money won't happen overnight.
Remember these 4 things you want to teach your kids about money (Credit: Dave Ramsey)
#1: Work – you have to work to get money
#2: Give – teach them to give a 10% tithe and teach them to be generous
#3: Spend wisely – teach them how to spend money on the right things
#4: Save – encourage them to set aside money that is not for spending
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Teach Your Kids About Money at an Early Age
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Have you ever considered teaching your kids about money? That is not an exciting thing to think about. But you must agree with me that it is vitally important to their future. You may say what if I don’t teach them, are you saying they will never know how to manage their money well. No, I'm not saying that.
But if you want your kids to have less stress and problems financially in their lives teach them about money early.
The Bible even tells us in:Proverbs 22:6 : “Start Children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.”
There are at least four major things we should teach our kids about money . Let’s look at one – Work. Yes, they need to be taught (at an early age I might add) that money comes from work. It doesn’t just grow on trees or out of the ground for us to go grab whenever we need some! I was fortunate in the fact that I did have a Christian father who trained me, and my two brothers about Money.
It is just reality; kids do not think about money and the value of money until they need to make their own purchases.
In our society today we give our kids money freely for so many things. They have no idea the value of money or how hard you need to work for it. Until they are taught. You can do this by giving them chores and compensating them with commissions. And by sharing with them how you get your pay from your job. It is that pay that allows you to provide the home, the groceries, pay for electricity they enjoy, all of these realities they see and experience each day. So, teaching a child about the importance to work to get their pay, teaches them what to expect as they grow older. Let them know that Not working is not an option because they will need money.
Have a great day!
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Rocky and Adrian
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Have you ever seen Rocky 1? In that movie, Rocky falls in love with this girl -- you know what her name is? Yeah, Adriaaaannn. There’s this great moment in the film where Adrienne’s brother is asking Rocky questions about why he likes his sister. Rocky drops a profound line. He says “Gaps you know? I got gaps, she got gaps, but together we ain’t got no gaps.” It’s profound because often the way we think about life and even our finances are very different than the way our wives think. And individually we might be good, but we are not great. We got gaps! You likely view money differently than your wife and that’s a good thing. Opposites generally attract right? God did that on purpose. So instead of fighting about differences, lean into them.
1 Corinthians 12: 4-6 says:
4 There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them. 5 There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. 6 There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work.
You got gaps, she got gaps, but together, together you ain’t got no gaps.
Get on the same page with your wife, pursue unity, set financial goals, pray together about your financial goals, and lean into each other's strengths.
If each of us did this, the world would be a better place. So, let's go!
Today, let’s make the world a better place.
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Pray With Your Wife About Money
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It took my wife and I a long time to feel comfortable praying together. Even now, it is something we continue growing in, but it does not stop us from praying together. Even more, each month when we do our budget, we make sure we pray together for two things.
First, we thank God for the resources He has provided for us.
And two, we pray for His wisdom to handle the money He has entrusted to us that month in a way that brings Him honor and glory. The goal for our marriage is much more about unity and drawing closer to God as we pursue the goals He has given us then it is about actually accomplishing the goals. The goals are a means to an end.
Mark 3:25 says: If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand.
So today, I know it sounds crazy, but go pray with your wife. And if you are already doing that, let me encourage you to pray about your money and your finances together. Our maker and creator cares about things we care about, so don’t feel weird or hesitant to go to Him with your wants and needs.
He listens.
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Marriage & Money (EP. 218)
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Trav and Scott are back for Week 3 of The Money Series. This week we dive into Money & Marriage! Marriages break up for 3 main reasons – money, sexy, and children and MONEY is at the top. How do you keep money from being an issue in your marriage? Men, you have to invite God into your marriage, specifically in the context of your money. Can a marriage survive where the husband and wife don't talk about their finances? Understanding how your spouse views money is extremely important. Scott breaks down the Four Money Languages by Dr. Kenneth Doyle. Most likely you and your wife will view money differently. Despite the money differences you can still find unity.
Four Practical tips for managing your money in your marriage:
* #1 – Pray about your finances
* #2 – Ask questions – find out what your wife's money language is
* #3 – Create a budget
* #4 – Make a plan and discuss it regularly
We would love to help equip you for this journey, reach out to us today and let us be a resource for you! https://menofiron.org/contact-us/
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Talk to Your Wife About Money
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The number one reason people get divorced in the United States is money. If you are married, do you and your spouse have regular meetings about your money? Do you fight or do you both stay cool when you talk about money?
In Ephesians 4:1-3 it says:
As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.
The first step to success in marriage and handling money in marriage, is to pursue unity.
So, my encouragement to you today is to set time aside with your wife to talk about money.
Ask some good questions, discover how your spouse feels about where you currently are and what could be improved. But remember, be completely humble and gentle; be patient with your wife as you listen and share. The most important thing we are called to as married men is unity and oneness with our wives.
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Should Christians Tithe 10%?
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Just like you, I want to do well financially. I think it’s natural for us to want to win in our Finances. It’s tempting to cut corners to win though, isn’t it? But what I’ve found is that God’s wisdom is different that the worlds wisdom.
Take the tithe for instance... The tithe is 10%. And God says if we are willing to trust Him and bring back 10% of our income to Him. He promises to take care of our needs.
In Malachi 3 it says:
10 Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,” says the Lord Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it.
When I read this I’m nudged to make sure I bring the whole tithe. The whole 10%. Not 5%, Not 8%. The whole 10%. Listen, I know this is difficult, but don’t trust me on this, trust God on this.
What would our local churches be able to accomplish if we, as men, followed God on this? The church would be empowered to meet needs and be a bright light in the community.
So, join me today, let’s tithe, let’s stop thinking about it and “just do it!”
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Do You Like Paying the Tax Man?
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Ok it’s time to get your taxes done! And yes, as much as we don’t like to do it, we have to pay the tax man. It’s biblical…
There’s a fun story about this in Matthew 17:24-27.
24 After Jesus and his disciples arrived in Capernaum, the collectors of the two-drachma temple tax came to Peter and asked, “Doesn’t your teacher pay the temple tax?”
25 “Yes, he does,” he replied.
When Peter came into the house, Jesus was the first to speak. “What do you think, Simon?” he asked. “From whom do the kings of the earth collect duty and taxes—from their own children or from others?”
26 “From others,” Peter answered.
“Then the children are exempt,” Jesus said to him. 27 “But so that we may not cause offense, go to the lake and throw out your line. Take the first fish you catch; open its mouth and you will find a four-drachma coin. Take it and give it to them for my tax and yours.”
Ok, so if I were you, I would not go get my fishing stuff right now and hope to catch a trout with a mouth full of gold… But I would take heart in understanding that no matter what your tax bill might be, God provides. Our great teacher, Jesus, paid his taxes and he wants us to do the same.
So today, trust God, seek His wisdom and trust that He will provide for our needs despite how big our tax bill may be.
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Does God Really Own Your Money? | EP. 217
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Trav and Scott start are back this week as we continue The Money Series! When we think about your money is it really YOUR money or is God's money? In the Parable of the Talents in Matthew 25 we see the master entrusting the servants with his estate. Although each servant is entrusted with different sums of money, it still all belongs to the master. All of our money, time and abilities come from God, we are responsible for stewarding it well for the Kingdom of God. God is the supplier, He is the source, He gives us all things. We often hear the popular phrase, money is the root of all evil. But as we read in 1 Timothy 6:10, it is the LOVE of money that is the root of evil. It's easy as men to put our focus on money and success. To put our careers over our relationship with God. This will ultimately lead to destruction and ruin. Men, trust God with your finances. Steward well ALL that He has supplied you with. It's not our money, it's God's.
How do I put God first when it comes to money?
#1 - Tithe 10% – tithing is just returning the 10% that God gave you
#2 – Steward your money well
#3 – Give generously
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Lessons From Joseph
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One of my favorite stories in the Bible is about a man named Joseph. Have you ever heard his story?
Joseph’s story is a great example of what it means to serve God despite difficult circumstances. In spite of his difficult circumstances, Joseph kept his faith and was a faithful steward
Genesis 39:2-6 says…
2 The Lord was with Joseph so that he prospered, and he lived in the house of his Egyptian master. 3 When his master saw that the Lord was with him and that the Lord gave him success in everything he did, 4 Joseph found favor in his eyes and became his attendant. Potiphar put him in charge of his household, and he entrusted to his care to everything he owned. 5 From the time he put him in charge of his household and of all that he owned, the Lord blessed the household of the Egyptian because of Joseph. The blessing of the Lord was on everything Potiphar had, both in the house and in the field. 6 So Potiphar left everything he had in Joseph’s care; with Joseph in charge, he did not concern himself with anything except the food he ate.
After reading this, the question I ask myself is… am I working hard and keeping my focus on my relationship with Jesus despite difficult circumstances? Am I using the gifts, talents, abilities and resources that God has blessed me with in a way that would make non-believers take notice?
Despite our circumstances, lets choose to embrace God and His wisdom.
Go make it a great day!
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Ask God For Help With Your Finances
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Are you in a difficult financial spot right now? Have you asked God to help you?
Here’s a truth God owns everything; we just manage it. Genesis 1:1 says “in the beginning God created the Heavens and the earth.” That means He created everything and no matter how difficult the situation, God has what we need. Even more, he knows what we need more than we do!
If God is the giver of all resources and knows our needs, we can trust Him to provide.
When He does provide, He calls us to manage the resources well. Not just manage it our way but manage it His way. He wants us to use the resources, skills, talents and abilities that He’s entrusted to us for His glory.
To know God’s way, we must spend time with Him. So, let me encourage you to spend time with him today. Let me ask again, are you in a difficult financial spot right now? Have you asked God to help you? Take 2 minutes and ask Him right now… then take 1 minute of silence. Pause and listen, see what thoughts come to mind after you ask Him for help, if He asks you to do something then go do it!
Ask God for help, He owns everything, and He cares deeply for you.
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Lead By Example | Be a Godly Husband and Father
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Men, if we’re called to be a godly husband and father, then it’s critical to know what that even means. We’re going to spend time trying to put some framework around it. We’ve talked before about how blended families are outside God’s original plan for the family and how that adds additional odds against you, but this discussion involves all men trying to step into the role God has for you in your home.
First and foremost, a godly leader of the household must have a solid relationship with God. How can you emulate God in your home if you are far from Him yourself. Not only that, but it’s such a difficult calling that I believe you can’t succeed without the help of Holy Spirit.
Next, you have to love and honor your wife. This sounds obvious but it isn’t nearly as easy as it initially seems. God tells us that we are to love our wives as Christ loves the church. Now it doesn’t sound so simple, right? That’s a deep love that will require intentionality. On top of that, when your kids see you loving your wife the right way, it will teach your boys how to treat their wives one day and it will teach your girls what they should be looking for in a husband down the road. Also, if you’re in a blended family situation, by loving and honoring your wife, you are setting new precedence for your kids and God can use that to break generational struggles in the area of marriage.
Finally, you need to lead your family with consistent selfless service. Jesus was the best example of servant leadership that we’ve ever seen. The way he interacted with everyone he met throughout his journey showed compassion that drew people to Him. In all your interactions you have with your family try to instill that same compassion.
Now, are you going to hit home runs with this right away? Probably not but taking little steps to better fill the role God is empowering you to take will impact your wife and kids more than everything in this life outside of God Himself.
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Recognize God As Your Source
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When I was young and played football, my dad was my coach. He taught me a ton about how to play well on the offensive and defensive line. But as I got older and more experienced I started to realize my dad would give me less advice and instead send to me to my coaches. My dad had realized that he’d taught me all he could teach me and I was at a point where I needed to go to a more reliable source. A source that would challenge me more and in turn help me grow.
As I said Monday, there are lots of people and programs that want to tell you what to do with your money. And most are not bad. But, are you spending time with the most reliable source you have access (God’s Word)? Are you making sure the money advisors in your life are advising you according to God’s values? We can’t just rely on what human being tell us or encourage us to do. Human’s are broken and even when they mean good, they can unintentionally lead us astray.
So, it’s essential to go to the one place that will never lead us astray – God.
Go to him in prayer and go to his word asking for his wisdom in how we handle the resources he’s entrusted to us.
Proverbs 3:1-2 “My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart, for they will prolong your life many years and bring you peace and prosperity.”
I don’t know about you but I want that peace and prosperity and there’s only one place to get it. You know where that is? Yup, its from God and from his teaching. We’re called to keep His commands in our hearts.
Know the teaching - Keep the commands - Experience Everlasting Peace and Prosperity.
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What Does the Bible Say About Money? (EP. 216)
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Happy April Fool's Day! Trav and Scott kick off the pod this month with a bang as we debut The Money Series! There's a powerful and in inseparable tie between our true spiritual condition and our attitude and actions concerning money and possessions. You can't get away from money, you need it everyday. It's easy to accumulate wealth or success and forget our need for God. But the reality is God owns everything and I just manage it. Think about this, what if God asked you – how are you doing with my money? What would be your response? Are your eyes on God who has given us everything we have or are your eyes on what we have?
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Focus on the Foundation
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There’s a lot of ideas, philosophies, and teachings out there about money. Everyone’s got an opinion on what to do with money. How to treat it, how to spend it, save it, invest it. As you already know, some of those sources are better than others.
But theirs one resource that’s absolute truth. It’s God’s word.
God has a lot to say about money. Money is a significant topic in the bible. So, Yes, you can turn to it and trust what it says.
Matthew 7:24-27- “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock.
If we want to win with money, and win God’s way, we’ve got to read his word. You and I have got to know what it says, then we’ve got to do the hard part and actually do what it says.
Knowing what it says + Doing what it says = Wisdom
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Pray For Your Blended Family
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The most recent US census states there are 1,300 stepfamilies being formed every day in our country. That translates to over 30 million children under the age of 13 that live with one biological parent and their spouse. When I first heard that stat, it staggered me. I think it’s pretty common knowledge that as a country we aren’t the best when it comes to the success rate of the traditional marriage.
I’m almost ashamed to say it’s easy to overlook the negative ripple effects on children in these situations even though my childhood home life was blended, and I have a blended family myself.
With that in mind, it’s with no judgement that I say blended families have more challenges by nature because they are outside of God’s original design. Being a good husband and father is already difficult enough but now we’re throwing even more odds against your success. That’s all the more reason to be intentional as a father and husband in a blended family.
To lead your household well, start with your own personal relationship with God.
Make sure you are always recalibrating your faith to put God at the center of all you do. Pursue a genuine relationship with the Father.
Once you’ve been able to put God at the center of your life, then you can start to implement small steps to lead your family in a God honoring way. One of the most impactful things you can start to incorporate into your home is for you to pray with your spouse and each of your kids individually on a daily basis.
This can be a little tricky at first, so maybe start slowly by doing it 2 or 3 times a week and building up. I know times I’ve been the most intentional with this practice in my own life have been the times when I’ve seen God move the most in my home.
Give it a try for yourself and see all the amazing things God will start to do in your blended family home.
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Leading Your Blended Family (EP. 215)
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This week we wrap up our Family Series as we talk about a taboo topic in the church, blended families. In the most recent U.S. Census it says that there are 1,300 step families being created every day. A blended family is different biological households that are now combined due to divorce, the death of a spouse, etc. Blended families are something that we need to be talking about. God's design for the family in scripture was very specific. But the reality is we live in a broken world with broken relationships. If you are a dad leading a blended family, you know that you are going to face some challenges that a traditional family might not have to deal with. It's going to take a little more work and a little more intentionality. But God can and will redeem your role as the leader of your family.
Five Practical For Creating a Healthy Blended Family
#1 – Put God first in YOUR life
#2 – Show your kids what a godly husband and father looks like
#3 – Deal with the trauma – be aware of it, be open about it, talk about it
#4 – You are the spiritual leader for your biological kids AND your step kids
#5 – Be respectful of the other family involved
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What Can the Brokenness Teach You?
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Have you ever really sat back and thought about how important your perspective is when it comes to dealing with hard things? We’ve been talking through some small steps you can take to help you begin the recovery process from a broken relationship.
You can choose to stay in an angry or bitter state but that will only dig the hole deeper and increase the pain you feel.
You can try the easy road and choose to ignore it in hopes that it goes away on its own. Which it won’t.
Or, you choose to be intentional to address the issue because the ripple effects of not dealing with it can be dangerous to every relationship you have and there’s no reason why you should be carrying the weight of that pain longer than you need to.
That’s why your mindset is so important. The Christian journey is so reliant on encountering the things this life brings your way, processing it with God, and growing towards new revelation of who you are in Him.
When you’re dealing with something as difficult as a broken relationship, at some point you have to have some serious conversations with God about it. He will certainly comfort you and help you in the healing process, but even beyond that, He will begin to reveal things that you can learn from the experience.
Never having another healthy relationship or shying away from people to protect yourself are not real options.
Start to have conversations with Him about what you can learn.
Journal through the process. Make notes of the things He begins to reveal to you and then move forward.
I don’t want to minimize how difficult this can be, but I know from personal experience that we are able to do more in Christ than we ever could do on our own. He has this amazing way of turning ashes to roses but our growth mindset and seeking Him are the keys to that process.
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