Family Discipleship 101 - The Run With Horses Podcast
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Family Discipleship 101
What?
There is a family discipleship crisis! How do we know? Look at the church culture and compare it to the world culture. Do you see a difference? No? There is a family discipleship crisis!
Parents are often overwhelmed with their own spiritual issues and have trouble finding the time and spiritual energy to help their children navigate life biblically.
So what is family discipleship? It is simply parents taking responsibility for their own and their children’s spiritual growth. Instead of leaving it up to the church to disciple your children, it is taking initiative to know and grow your kids! And it all starts with your personal walk with Jesus.
Why?
First, it is your role a parent. It is in the job description! Deut. 6.
My understanding is that in the past, maybe even through the 1960’s, parents were much more involved and aware of the need to be involved in their kids’ lives. Today, many expect the church and Christian schools to do it and even choose a church based on what is available for their kids!
Second, you are in the best place to work with your kids throughout the formative years of their life. You are with them most often and should be in a place to know them best.
Third, no one but God loves them more than you do!
How-To?
Keep it simple and build a foundation you can add to as they grow.
My personal belief is that all disciple making is relational, and this is even more important with your kids. Really get to know them, not just tell them what to do.
Two keys are time and communication.
Talk about spiritual things with your children as you face things. You might not be able to share everything, but you can share general thoughts about where you are and the struggle and victories in your spiritual life. As you go through life, help your kids see God at work around you and in your family. Point out the blessings and teach them to be thankful. Having this as a goal is a great challenge for those of us who might not be naturally as thankful as we should be. Knowing your kids are watching you helps motivate you to be intentional about giving thanks!
Encourage your children to read the bible themselves and learn to look for God at work. Help them see what obedience looks like.
Keep your children engaged with the church family and help them learn to see God at work in the greater church family.
Take baby steps and build on the foundation you make! It is worth the effort so keep going! You can do it!
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Are you a Single Christian Parent? – Tips for Spiritually Supporting Your Children
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Single Christian Parent – Tips for Spiritually Supporting Your Children
Things not to do –
--Don’t badmouth the unsaved parent or the divorced parent. “Don’t listen to your mom.” Better way to approach that. “What does God say?” You can pray together for the unbelieving person.
--Don’t give in to depression, hopelessness, fear over ruining the kid because it’s just you. Don’t give up!
1. Trust God – He will do His part
Though it’s not ideal for both parents not to be Christians, God can work in spite of that.
Example: Timothy (with solid faith of mom and grandma)
Not ideal to be raised by one parent, God does amazing things there too!
2. You do your part – Be intentional
Work to build the relationship.
Be honest about your own limitations (time, work hours, expectations). God will provide.
Help child to learn to trust God as you trust Him, too.
Spend time in the Word of God together. Take child to church (if can).
Share your own spiritual testimony with them, apply Bible truths to daily life, pray together, etc. Make sure your spiritual life is open to your children, invite them into your relationship with God.
Try to provide good alternatives for your child if you have to be working and gone. -- library, creative outlets. Not just leaving them to video games, movies, etc.
Your attitude is so important! Don’t let regrets, past mistakes, etc. weigh you down and color how you move forward.
You, as the parent, can do a lot to encourage spiritual growth
3. Look for and Rely on the Christians around you
-- Christians in your own family (role models)
-- Christian role models in your church family
Connect your child with those who can assist in the gaps of your own parenting.
Pull in your church family – If you have no Christian wife, look for Christian women in your church who could meet some of those needs, be a good role model for your daughter. Don’t be afraid to ask for help! Look for the man who can be a dad to your son or the woman who can be a mom to your daughter. Encourage those relationships with healthy couples. Encourage friendships with girls (or boys if sons) who have healthy relationships with their parents.
4. Expect and trust your child to do his/her part, too. They must choose and respond.
Sometimes we feel bad for our kids, so we as parents try to overprotect them. It’s difficult, but God uses difficulties to grow people, too!
It is difficult. It’s not what you chose necessarily, but God can still do great things in you and your children!
Be patient over time, do the best you can, be open with your kids, understand that God is at work. Be in it for the long haul.
It is one day at a time. God is doing His part, you do yours and trust Him with the results!
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What do you expect from church? - The Run With Horses Podcast
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What do you expect from church?
What are your expectations of other people in the church? Are they different than what you expect from yourself?
(https://research.lifeway.com/2019/10/14/8-unrealistic-expectations-of-church-leaders-and-how-to-navigate-them/) By Joe McKeever
Some unrealistic expectations of leaders and church members adapted from Lifeway Research:
1. Every sermon will be a winner.
2. Every church member will be happy and kind all the time.
3. Every doctrinal question will be answered in the sermons.
4. Every church program or event will be successful.
5. Every worship service will meet everyone's needs, felt and actual.
6. The church is solely responsible for all children's spiritual development.
7. The pastor should be available to everyone at all times.
8. Every church leader should be superhuman, never tired, grumpy, needing a raise, etc.
The answer as presented in the article is pretty good.
1. Get people praying. Particularly about real spiritual heart change and the spiritual condition of the church and community.
2. Address issues in small groups. Perfectionism, the role of the church in life and ministry, the mission of Jesus and every Believers responsibility are good topics for small group study and discussion.
3. Focus on discipleship. If every Believer is dedicated to intentionally applying efforts to growing in the character of Jesus and making real intentional efforts to be engaged in the mission of Jesus to the world, real spiritual growth and heart change results.
I would add to that, encourage and develop a church culture that is pro Scripture. Encourage reading daily, not just a verse or two but multiple chapters. Share good audio Bibles, and encourage listening to Scripture. Develop a church culture that is hungry for God's Word and mature enough to be directly engaged in reading and studying it themselves , not just relying on pastors and teachers in the church for their spiritual growth. Hear, Obey and Share.
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Prayer, Fasting and Disciple Making - PT. 2
Prayer, Fasting and Disciple Making - PT. 2
One clear point that struck me as important. In DMM around the world, there is a clear focus on prayer and fasting over leadership and strategy.
Biblical foundations are the goals but churches and groups can use the Bible to justify drastically different methodologies.
This conference focused on Scripture and DM. The churches I have been a part of my whole life also focus on Scripture but seem more concerned with correct teaching than obedience. Not that a call to obedience isn't there, it just isn't support well in the church structure and systems. Heart issues aren't addressed to the extent that truth is taught.
Is that just my experience or would you agree?
We rely more on a better program or event, really focusing on doing it well, instead of really focusing on relying on God to do the work. At least a lack of prayer would seem to indicate our focus.
"Be obedient, good luck, there will be a lesson on the work of the HS as it relates to the justification of the Saints next week. See you then." I am asking if we can do better at supporting a life of obedience without leaving Biblical doctrine behind. I think the answer is yes.
Jesus seems to have spent consistent regular time in prayer. He was marked by it to the point that His disciples, who would have been familiar with prayer in their culture as Jews, asked Jesus to teach them to pray. They saw a difference in His prayers and the prayers of the spiritual leaders in the temple.
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Prayer, Fasting and Disciple Making - PT. 1
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Prayer, Fasting and Disciple Making - PT. 1
Just returned from National Disciple Makers Forum 2023 in Indianapolis, IN.
Today, we want to give an overview of Prayer and Fasting from the conference and add some of our thoughts and experiences.
Shodankeh Johnson - West Africa - God's Word can Change a Country
Although the focus of the conference was on God's Word, Prayer was a parallel theme over the two days.
"We talk prayer, without praying". Shodankeh Ouch.
In the Disciple Making Movement in Africa, they teach people to pray as they walk as they sit down and as they stand up. From Deut 6:7 but applied to the prayer life of the church.
Prayer in America: A Detailed Analysis of the Various Dimensions of Prayer
by Paul Froese, Jeremy E. Uecker
(https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/jssr.12810)
Does prayer with others matter?
Does time in prayer matter?
#NDMF2023
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Why is Community so Important?
Why is Community so Important? (in the life of a follower of Jesus)
We aren't meant to walk through this life alone. From beginning to end you see humanity living in a close relationship with others.
Genesis 2:18 - It isn't good that man should be alone.
True for all of us!
Why?
1.We all have a tendency to put ourselves at the center of the universe. Being around other people causes us to see that we are NOT the center. Arguments and fights in society are usually caused or made worse by the selfish nature of all people.
Philippians 2:3
Galatians 6:2
Romans 12:18
We learn about ourselves because we are forced to learn to get along with other people!
2.We will all need help at some time or another.
Ecclesiastes 4:12
Ephesians 4:11-16
The church is uniquely equipped to build up each other!
3.In some little ways we learn about forgiveness. It makes what God did more understandable and awesome! It is difficult for us to forgive little things.
Ephesians 4:32
4.God has chosen to use as the vehicles for His message of reconciliation to the world.
2 Corinthians 5:20
It is crazy to know that God invites us in to be a part of His mission to the world.
Conclusion
So what do we do with the knowledge that God has called us to be in the world but not of the world? Light bringers united in His marvelous body, the Church?
Ephesians 4:1
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The Untouchables. . .Who are they in your life?
The Untouchables. . .Who are they in your life?
Everyone sins. Sorry if this is news to you, but it's true. What is sin you ask? Sin is defined as missing the mark.
From Merriam-Webster sin is an offense against religious or moral law or an action that is or is felt to be highly reprehensible. Good old Merriam-Webster let us down on this one!
A more Biblical definition would agree with th at definition and add that sin is a missing of a standard, mark, or goal; or the breach of a relationship, rebellion.
Dart board - bullseye is not sin, everything else is. Sin is not always bad stuff!
For example?
But that isn't our topic today! Today I want to think about our attitude toward sin. Particularly someone else's sin.
If people struggle with a sin you don't, how do you view them?
Do you look down on people who sin in a way you don't think you would?
What kind of person do you look at and want to run the other way? Ignore, look down on, judge, criticize, shun, attack even.
What are the sins you find especially reprehensible? The ones you don't think you would ever do? Do you believe those sins are somehow worse than your own?
Is there ever a person we should intentionally stay away from?
The idea that sometimes we are so against a particular sin (lifestyle) that we forget that this is not their biggest problem. What IS their biggest problem?
Jesus' interactions with "untouchables"
-- Samaritan woman
-- Woman who wiped Jesus' feet with her hair. "If you knew what kind of woman this is..."
-- Zaccheus
-- Matthew, the tax collector
-- Lepers -- the unclean
-- Woman caught in adultery Jn. 8
Behavior versus Heart issues (similar with child rearing. You shouldn't merely address the behavior, but the motives behind it, the heart sin.)
What was Jesus' attitude toward these? He was kind, truthful about sin, but compassionate. He calls ALL to come to Him. Did Jesus die only for good people?
How do you develop and maintain Jesus' view? That is the hard part! To see people as God does!
How do you develop and maintain relationships with the untouchables? What does that mean? What does it look like? What doesn't it look like?
Why is it important?
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What is the "work of the ministry"?
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What is the "work of the ministry"?
If I asked you to tell me what ministry is, what would you say? Who does it? If it is "work" does it only count if you get paid to do it?
Just what is the work of the ministry and who is responsible for it?
Where do we typically get our image of what the work of the ministry is?
What does the Bible say?
Eph.4:11-16
If you've grown up in the church, you may have the tendency to view ministry as doing certain, pre-decided ministries within the church (pastor, deacon, nursery worker, Sunday school teacher, usher). Breaking away from considering ministry as ONLY these can be tough!
Ministry is all of that and more! Ministry is lived out in the relationships of every follower of Jesus.
Ministry can also be reaching out to those who are around you, when you see a need you can fill, a person you could invest in, a relationship you could build.
Life phases -- changes personal ministry. What you once did may need to change.
What is most important when all is said and done? Where is the value? Where do we see God at work, lives impacted, eternal fruit realized?
How do we evaluate where to best use our time, efforts, and spiritual gifts?
How to break out of the BOX other Christians (or you yourself) try to put you in...
Ministry equals ...WHAT?
It's not merely what makes me feel good about myself! I can feel productive without doing anything of eternal value.
Ministry is found whenever I submit my will to God's and surrender my life to be used by Him in the lives of others.
If you think about the "one anothers," how does that affect your view of the ministry? Where do we live out the one anothers throughout the week? Are we fulfilling these in practical ways?
Homework: Write down a list of people you'd like to build relationships with in order to invest in their lives. Then choose the top three. Reach out to each of these; put out "feelers" to see if they respond to you and your invitation to interact with each other (meet regularly, talk spiritually, grow together)
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Can You Disciple Yourself?
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Can You Disciple Yourself?
Good question! Everyone is in a different situation in life. You may be in the place where you don't have someone who is discipling you now even though you would benefit from it. Can you disciple yourself?
Matthew 28:18-20 NKJV
And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Amen.
II Timothy 2:1-2 NKJV
You therefore, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus. And the things that you have heard from me among many witnesses, commit these to faithful men who will be able to teach others also.
Colossians 1:28-29 NKJV
Him we preach, warning every man and teaching every man in all wisdom, that we may present every man perfect in Christ Jesus. To this end I also labor, striving according to His working which works in me mightily.
Ephesians 4:11-16
11And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, 12for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, 13till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ; 14that we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting, 15but, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ— 16from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love.
Clearly this is something that Jesus expected His followers to intentionally do! It is investing in the life of another, I would go so far to say that this is the heart of the church.
But the question remains, if no one is available to help you, can you disciple yourself?
Luke 9:23-24 NKJV
Then He said to them all, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will save it.
John 8:31
Then Jesus said to those Jews who believed Him, “If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed.
John 13:12-17
12So when He had washed their feet, taken His garments, and sat down again, He said to them, “Do you know what I have done to you? 13You call Me Teacher and Lord, and you say well, for so I am. 14If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. 15For I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you. 16Most assuredly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master; nor is he who is sent greater than he who sent him. 17If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them.
If you are a genuine follower of Jesus, you are His disciple. He gives you all that you need to grow in grace and to be changed into His image. So I believe that the answer is a qualified "sort of". What do I mean by that?
You are never left to your own devices as a follower of Jesus. You have the Bible and the example of Jesus. He gives you His teaching directly for you to follow. You have the indwelling Holy Spirit to guide you to understand and live out the truth you learn from His example and Word. You also have resources in the form of all the past books, sermons online, podcasts, videos, etc of the church from the past 2000 years. You will need discernment and to be constantly diligent, comparing what you read or hear to what the Bible actually says. It is my intention to always be true to God's Word but you shouldn't believe me either. Listen and look to the Bible. If what I say doesn't align with Scripture, follow Scripture (and let me know where I went off the rails so I can grow too!)
So you can grow without much direct help from another believer BUT I understand the Bible to teach that we should be involved in and with His church. He loves the church and has given it gifts that you need to reach your full potential. The church also needs you. If your church isn't making disciples, be the first to intentionally invest in someone. Lead the way. You see the need. Be part of the solution. And never stop growing and helping those around you to grow to be more like Jesus.
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Is it wrong? Thinking about gray areas in life.
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Is it wrong? Thinking about gray areas in life.
inspired by J. Oswald Sanders in A Spiritual Clinic
Sanders gives six questions that help guide us as we consider our choices.
Will it bring glory to God?
Admittedly we don’t always know exactly how God will use our choices to glorify Himself, but if it is our intention to lift Him up and honor Him in all things it is much easier to eliminate some choices.
Is it profitable?
Not financially but eternally. Is there spiritual value in my actions? Am I considering how my choices will reflect on the cause of Christ, my Church or the Gospel? It is worth spending time meditating on where real value lies.
Does it edify?
Does this action build up the body of Christ? Is it part of my ongoing growth in Christlikeness? Does it make following Jesus easier or more difficult? Too often we don’t think through the ramifications until we are dealing with the consequences.
Does it tend to enslave?
This is a tricky one in today’s world! Advertising dollars are spent to influence you toward things you don’t need and often wouldn’t want if you really stopped to think about it. Social Media is intentionally designed to keep you engaged and paying attention so that advertising dollars will continue to flow. You are the product that Social Media sells to make money.
Will it strengthen me against temptation?
Our choices, if they are consistent, make it easier or harder to resist temptation. Am I preparing to resist and planning to follow Jesus or am I mindlessly wandering through life hoping I recognize the dangers before I am trapped? Put on the whole armor of God and be prepared to stand your ground!
Is it characteristic of the world or of the Father?
Some things are obvious. This is the kind of thing God loves. This is the kind of thing God hates. Others may take a little more effort to think through to recognize.
These questions may clear up all of your doubts but Paul gives us a few principles in Romans 14 that also help when we think about doubtful things.
Liberty of Judgement, Romans 14:1-2 - there are many choices to be made! one eats, one doesn’t. You may be a vegetarian and I love hamburgers hot off the grill. Most are not worth arguing about so be careful.
Right of Personal Conviction, Romans 14:5 - as part of our many choices we need to make them based on personal conviction which has hopefully developed through careful study of God’ sWord and time in prayer along with conversation with the church family. You don’t live in a vacuum. Use the resources God gives you.
Accountability to God Alone, Romans 14:4 - God is the final judge of our actions and choices. That should give some gravitas to our decision making!
No Attitude of Judgement when others make different choices, Romans 14:10 - refer back one, God is the judge, not me or you. Leave that role to God and instead of judging, try to build up others, strengthen their faith and encourage a closer walk with God. If they are mistaken in their choices, a closer walk with Jesus can only help!
Abstinence in the Interests of Others, Romans 14:21- be willing to give up your ‘rights’ for the sake of others. Not easy, but it is part of considering others better than yourself. Remember that whole humility thing Jesus taught?
Abstinence from Things Doubtful, Romans 14:23
If you aren’t sure, leave it alone. Pursue the things you know God loves and grow in your ability to keep your focus on the clear things of God.
These questions and principles are helpful to us, particularly when we rely on the Holy Spirit to guide us as we think through our actions and choices in life. God works on our heart to draw us to Him, making our choices not legalistic and condemning, but a heartfelt song of praise in the form of a life of sacrificial worship to our Great God!
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How Do I Grow Spiritual Roots?
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How Do I Grow Spiritual Roots?
Luke 8:4 And when a great multitude had gathered, and they had come to Him from every city, He spoke by a parable: 5“A sower went out to sow his seed. And as he sowed, some fell by the wayside; and it was21 trampled down, and the birds of the air devoured it. 6Some fell on rock; and as soon as it sprang up, it withered away because it lacked moisture. 7And some fell among thorns, and the thorns sprang up with it and choked it. 8But others fell on good ground, sprang up, and yielded a crop a hundredfold.” When He had said these things He cried, “He who has ears to hear, let him hear!”
Luke 8:13 But the ones on the rock are those who, when they hear, receive the word with joy; and these have no root, who believe for a while and in time of temptation fall away.
1)Your foundation is important. Roots need good soil not concrete.
-soil provides anchor, physical support for plant - light pots in wind
-soil provides water retention, water dries up before roots can absorb it on concrete
-soil holds nutrients, vital components for healthy growth
Our Spiritual Life also requires a solid foundation. Where do you get your information about what is important in Life? How do you evaluate your words and actions? If you use the world's standard, you are trying to build a spiritual life on constantly shifting sand. Culture changes, opinions shift overnight. There is nothing solid to anchor to.
God's Word provides truth to shape our worldview and guidance to direct our choices. God IS Truth. Being firmly committed to Him means never having to worry about the foundation failing to support your spiritual growth.
2) Farmers work the soil. Preparation for the growth of plants.
- till, remove rocks and weeds
- some weeds have deep roots, all must be removed so they don't come back quickly
-farmers plan the year out according to the natural growth of the plants, best time and location for crops.
Cleaning up a patch of ground to become a field takes hard work. Learning to use the Bible also takes effort. Time is required, but the benefits are eternal.
Pulling out the deep roots of sin in your life is a never ending fight in this life. But it is work worth doing! Just as there is something satisfying about pulling out a weed, there is joy in seeing sin relinquish it's hold on you in one area of life.
3) Farmers plant the seed and then Trust God to make them grow. But, there is still work to do!
- weeding
- fertilizer
- trellis when needed, support for future growth
Getting started on your spiritual journey is just the beginning. Salvation is the start of a beautiful journey. Don't ever forget that the spiritual life is a process. Just as you must prep the soil and plant the seeds again year after year, spiritual growth is an ongoing work throughout your lifetime.
4) Remember, you don't Cause growth, but your choices support healthy growth or hinder healthy growth.
God is at work! Know what He is purposing in you and get with the program!
5) Eventually, in the time God has determined for each crop, you harvest.
There will be a harvest of righteousness. God has promised to complete His work. There is no need for discouragement or fear in the spiritual life. God will accomplish the work He started. He uses all of our life to move us toward the goal and we can be confident the once He has finished His work in us, we will be like Him!
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Why is it so difficult to consistently follow Jesus? Part 2
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3. Self-discipline has become a dirty word. Along with self-control, patience, endurance and many more concepts that are vital for a growing believer to develop.
The life of a disciple is a life of change. We are invited by Jesus to follow Him and when we do we begin a journey of change through trials. Trials actually come whether you follow Jesus or not, the only question is whether you have surrendered them to God to use as vehicles for spiritual growth.
Self-discipline is making the commitment to getting up in the morning and giving God first place, even when it costs you dearly. Surrendering your time to God, pursuing Him in your quiet time takes discipline and persistence. And it is worth it!
How does self-control, self-discipline and the like relate to surrendering to the work of the Holy Spirit?
4. We like to do it ourselves.
At heart most of us are loners when it comes to the spiritual life. We may love people and love being around people all the time, but we don't want them to see us as we really are, as we know ourselves to be. It feels safer to be alone on our journey, even though God lets us know it's not. We need the ministry of the church family. The church family needs our gifts to be all that it can be. There is no getting around it, as a follower of Jesus, you are on the journey with other people and we need each other.
We do we resist so hard? What would make it easier for us?
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Why is it so difficult to consistently follow Jesus?
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Why is it so difficult to consistently follow Jesus?
1. We like the easy road.
Creature comforts are comfortable!
Do Hard Things is the name of a book, not the desire of most people.
Alex and Brett Harris wrote the book, very few of us want to live the life.
In A Pit With A Lion On A Snowy Day by Mark Batterson
James 1:2-4 My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.
Why are trials necessary for our faith?
2. Our priorities are vague and shift over time.
Many start out well, following Jesus, learning and growing; but something happens as life intrudes and pressure from others to conform overwhelm us. The culture around you is against Christ and it is overwhelming in the volume of mixed messages it sends. Any of them will lead you on a path away from Jesus and the enemy is happy with that.
Why is it so difficult to clarify and keep Biblical priorities?
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