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Yoga, Conan, and My Minecraft Lake House. 6/26/2025.
Happy Thursday.
Scene: Early morning atop a misty cliff. Conan the Barbarian stands shirtless, gazing into the sunrise. A woman nearby twists into a complicated yoga pose. Conan watches, arms crossed, expression unreadable.
🧘♂️ Conan the Barbarian on Yoga
“You bend like a serpent, yet do not strike. Strange... but disciplined.”
At first, Conan was suspicious.
Why sit still? Why breathe slowly? Why not lift a boulder or wrestle a bear?
But then he tried it.
He stood tall in Mountain Pose, feet grounded like tree roots.
He stretched into Warrior Pose, and grunted approvingly.
He attempted Downward Dog, and tore his loincloth.
His verdict:
“Yoga is no simple art for soft folk. It is a battle against one’s own flesh. A test of will, breath, and balance.”
He now does it on stormy mornings, atop cliffs, in silence.
His favorite poses?
Warrior II
Cobra
And, reluctantly... Child’s Pose ("only after battle").
When a wandering monk asked Conan if he found inner peace through yoga, he replied:
“No. But my back hurts less when I cleave skulls in half.”
& & & & & & &
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