christianity and stolen valour regarding 1st saints/martyrs

I fully accept I've done a lot worse than a lot of older christians, but unlike the milk toast christians I've put my life and suffering on the line as a newer convert to make things right, and still they look down on me though they'd never do the same to make things right, but also they'd never ever be like this christian preacher which is more important, while claiming to be soldiers of christ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hjVgbDXXA98