NorthKorea

North Korean cookery classes have re-commenced, starting with a dish inspired by classical Swiss cuisine, the fondue. Our cooker shows us how to carefully dissolve tree bark (innards only, obviously) with neat vodka and, by carefully adding stewed goats milk (obtained by stewing your goat) a delicious Swiss style fondue is ready in around 4 hours (or sooner if the gas stays on long enough). Commenting exclusively on North Korea Televisoin, Dear Leader Kim Jung Un said that he was "delighted that the worker peasants would soon be able to afford Swiss food and get as fat as that Shayne Smith off of Vice"".

Hilarious North Korea Propaganda Christian Bible Study: Noah's Ark Explained to North Korea Christians - Bible Study Live Secretly recorded hilarious broadcast from North Korea Televisoin's Christian News Channel of the English language "North Korea Christian Bible Study" program, explaining the Noah's Ark story. North Koreans Christians are now free to listen to Christian Bible Study classes on air and to attend Christian churches (except worker-peasants for obvious reasons). Hear, in English, the amazing story of Noah and his dear wife Rebekka lovingly explained by an increasingly incredulous English broadcaster, as North Koreans gather to hear Christian Bible Study classes for the first time since America retreated in the Korean War. Although in its' early stages, the North Korea Christian News Channel Bible Study program is expected to expand rapidly,

North Korea Cannibals Hold 3 Minute Silence For Murdered US School Children - North Korea Horrified At The Waste Whole families openly sobbed in North Korea today, as the news spread of the ongoing murders of US schoolchildren and the resulatant waste. Tiny children in USA schools constantly shoot each other to death and are often joined by "grown up" adults - all enjoying smearing each others blood and organs around carefully arranged classroom displays of their school work, as part of a "futuristic" curriculum. It is compulsory in many US schools for innocent little children to carry guns, ostensibly for "self defense". Dear Leader, Kim Jong Un, speaking exclusively to North Korea Televisoin, commented "what a waste of life this is. Some of these children are quite fat and could feed families for several days" Thirteen school shootings have been recorded in the US in the first six weeks of the year - more than double the 2013 average, advocates of gun control have pointed out. Since the Sandy Hook school massacre in December 2012, in which 26 people were shot dead by a lone gunman, there was an average of under three school shootings a month across the US in 2013. According to the joint analysis by Moms Demand Action and Mayors Against Illegal Guns, there have been there have been at least 44 fatal and non-fatal assaults, suicides, and unintentional shootings since the Sandy Hook elementary school shooting in Newtown, Connecticut. The death toll stands at 28. The study is set to kickstart the debate on US gun control laws which flared up in the wake of the Sandy Hook shooting but has gone quiet since. The campaign groups criticised Washington for failing to legislate for tighter controls such as like background checks on all gun sales. The study shows that of all the school shootings in American elementary, middle or secondary schools since December 2012, eight of the shooters were under the age of 16 and included one five-year-old.