“The Infamous Kiss” – BURN HIM!

I’m sure you’ve heard by now about the infamous kiss where Spanish football President Luis Rubiales kissed midfielder Jennifer Hermoso without her permission. The reaction across the media was swift – BURN HIM! As with many things of late, you’re only allowed to have one opinion on this story, and that is you have to demand that he be punished to the maximum extent possible. He has to lose his job. He has to lose his livelihood. He has to be charged with sexual assault! It’s the crime of the century, right? Right? In this video, as I often tend to do, I wish to play devil’s advocate.

First of all, of course I think nobody should be the victim of an unwanted kiss. Nobody should be forced to kiss anybody. Of course not! This is not me supporting Mr Rubiales’ actions, but one thing I like less than an unwanted kiss is mob mentality, and as usual, that’s what we’re seeing. The mob demands blood, figuratively speaking. A simple slap on the wrist will not do! They want him out! They want him to be charged with a crime! But is this a proportionate response? Are unwanted kisses so rare and so evil that we must act with overwhelming force to eradicate them once and for all? Here are my comments, noting once again, I’m not here to defend Mr Rubiales.

When I was a kid growing up in Australia, my uncles and aunties would come over, and without fail, my aunties would kiss me. Often on the cheek. Sometimes on the lips. Either way, I didn’t like it. If I protested, they just did it more, not in a spiteful way, but in an affectionate way. Occasionally, I would complain to my parents, but as I grew up, I realised this is just what they did to show affection. Despite not liking it, I got used to it.

In my early 20s, I moved to Japan. The Japanese typically do not like public displays of affection, exactly how I like it. However, where I was working, I was surrounded by people from all different countries. One of my flatmates, an American guy, was dating an Italian lady. Whenever I met her, she would always kiss me. In formal settings, she just kissed me on the cheek. In more casual settings, like in a bar after she had a couple of wines, she’d kiss me on the lips – just a quick peck – but I hated it. I know it was just her way of greeting people, because she pretty much did it to anybody she was friends with, or who was friends with her boyfriend.

In Japan, I also knew an older Spanish couple. The lady also always kissed me as a greeting or when saying goodbye. Again, I didn’t like it, but I put up with it, because by this stage of my life, I just realised some people liked kissing as part of their culture, or whatever. Yeah, I didn’t like it, but after growing up with aunties who always did it, I just assumed this is what humans do.

When I came back to Australia, a lot of my friends’ mothers, or neighbours would come up and kiss me, you know, as a “long time no see” sort of kiss. Again, I didn’t like it, but I just grinned and bore it.

Even Seinfeld had an episode where everyone was kissing Jerry when they met him, and he was just sick of it, so he asked them to stop, which they didn’t take too kindly to and ended up defacing his photo.

As you can tell, I’ve experienced a lot of unwanted kisses in my life. I presume other listeners have as well. The only reason these unwanted kisses stopped really, is because of the pandemic, but I presume they’ll start up again soon enough.

So what’s my point? Well… Mr Rubiales is Spanish. He comes from a touchy-feely culture, one which I’ve experienced. He got caught up in emotion and kissed a player after she won the World Cup. I’m not saying he did the right thing, not at all. I personally hate people kissing me. I completely understand how people didn’t like it. But does this mean we need to cancel him?

And just one more point. What if the opposite happened? It doesn’t take very long to find an example on the internet. 40-year-old Jenny McCarthy kissed 18-year-old Justin Bieber grabbing him by the neck and then the butt after announcing him as the winner of the pop album of the year. All in good fun, right? Justin simply replied, “I feel violated right now”.

So if he shouldn’t be cancelled, what do I think should happen to Luis Rubiales? Based on this one kiss alone, and assuming nothing else has gone on behind closed doors, personally I think a simple “I’m sorry to have upset you. I got caught up in the moment. I promise to never do it again” would be enough. But actually, he has already apologised, but that wasn’t enough. The insatiable mob want him burnt.

SPANISH SOCCER BOSS LUIS RUBIALES ASKED TO QUIT AMID SEX ASSAULT PROBE AND MOTHER'S HUNGER STRIKE
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2023-08-29/luis-rubiales-faces-sex-assault-investigation-in-spain/102786468

JENNY MCCARTHY KISSES JUSTIN BIEBER, THEN EXPLAINS HERSELF
https://www.latimes.com/entertainment/envelope/la-xpm-2012-nov-19-la-et-mg-mccarthy-kisses-bieber-amas-justin-bieber-story.html

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Allégro by Emmit Fenn